Belonging is Everywhere | Disabled Hikers Storytelling Project

Disabled Hikers interviewed Amber Katzira about their experiences finding belonging in nature and the importance of time outdoors for physical, mental, and emotional well being. Amber also shares the ways that criminalization of camping in the US has affected their health and safety, and how meaningful it was to experience "right to roam" in other countries. CN: mentions of assault, criminalization, trauma

Disabled Hikers: How has nature supported you as a neurodivergent person with trauma? Has your sense of safety and well-being shifted with time outdoors?

Amber Katzira: Honestly there aren't words enough to express how much. Its not just psycho-emotional or whatever, it's very physical. When spending time in Nature, of course I feel less stressed and more content, which affects every body system. Inflammation, fatigue, these are all reduced. But it's more magical than that, it’s like it flips a switch that changes everything in my system. Because it reminds me very deeply, in a way that even my deep nervous system and body systems understand, that we are part of something harmonious and beautiful, relational and cooperative. That we are not and can never be outcasts. That belonging is everywhere.

a selfie of a non-binary person with red wavy hair, white skin and blue eyes in a mossy forest where deep pink foxglove is growing in the background, they are smiling.

DH: How have your experiences of pain, chronic fatigue, or cognitive differences impacted your access to nature? What kinds of barriers do you encounter?

AK: Even though I do experience a reduction in pain, inflammation and fatigue, I still have these things, especially with walking. There are times I can walk very far and times I can't and shouldn't walk at all. I don't think the outdoors should be about walking or even necessarily about moving from point A to B. There are times when I'd just like to Forest Bathe and not go anywhere. What if we had resting places in Nature that were harmonious with the land? Places you could lay down for example? I saw something like it in the Swiss Alps where they had curvy wooden ergonomic benches so you could lay down with your head supported and view the scenery! But they were in a very inaccessible location. These should be in places you can get to easily but are outside the city.

The other problem is that I don't drive due to cognitive differences and there are very few ways to get to Nature without a car. What if public transit went to more Nature areas instead of just towns? What if agencies drove disabled people to Nature instead of just to like doctors appointments? And in general, if people organized to drive those who couldn't to Nature areas frequently?

DH: What does time outdoors look like for you? What activities do you enjoy?

AK: I enjoy camping, making fires, cooking over them. Foraging and making herbal medicines. Making cordage and baskets from plants. Especially invasive ones, as a way to not only clear them but also make them into something useful and beautiful. I also enjoy just being with all the beings, having sensory moments, touching leaves, sharing energy with trees, seeing shapes in the sky, faces in the rocks and so much more, just communing. I also love a good ritual, all our rituals, no matter what tradition, are more powerful outdoors, on the Earth, I believe.

DH: What does camping mean for you? How does it feel different to camp out of necessity or by choice? Have you experienced stigmatization or criminalization for camping?

AK: Camping is kind of fraught for me. I have been homeless many times due to being disabled and autistic and not being able to work. It was both liberating and terrifying. In a way, I enjoyed finding places to camp, using my skills to live instead of working to pay rent to a landlord. However being disabled meant I was sometimes not able to care for myself, and now it would be even harder since I have trouble walking sometimes.

But the hardest thing was the criminalization. I could sleep outside ok, find lovely places to sleep on the earth, but then have constant fear of being arrested, ticketed, woken up in the middle of the night, having my camping gear confiscated so I couldn't survive outdoors. Over time it was a constant source of anxiety, because that did happen, many times. It's led me to have anxiety even when I'm legally camping now. There was also the worry of being assaulted, because of being outside with no protection, which has also happened many times. Other things are criminalized which could improve our quality of life, such as hitchhiking, making things and selling them on the street, busking, or even just sitting in public nowadays.

a scene from the Carpathian mountains where my ancestors used to live: a steep forested slope with a bare rock mountain top that is striated and gray in color

When I learned that some countries have “right to roam” I wanted to experience that. It's like another reality after being criminalized just for camping for years and years. I went to a country with “right to roam” a few years ago. I asked my hosts how would I know I'm on private property and where is ok to camp? They told me, no one will mind if you're on their property, they will be happy to see someone enjoying the outdoors! Wow! I couldn't wrap my brain around it. We aren't even allowed to sit on public property here a lot of the time much less sleep. So the way camping is highly regulated here, only in designated areas where you usually need a car and it's expensive and you need reservations and so on, it's very directly because camping is associated with homelessness and poverty and that's stigmatized in the US.

I still love camping but it's a whole thing, with a lot of trauma attached to it for me now. If I could, I'd mostly live outdoors or in very natural housing, such as a rammed earth house. I feel WAY better if I do and all my issues get better. I probably have chemical sensitivities that are improved by it. But that seems to be possible only if you have money to live on land and build stuff.

I've never found a way to live the way I need to, ideally for my mental and physical health, instead usually living in subpar housing with mold or other issues. So that's all very hard and has systemic reasons of ableism and classism.